Kids in Church
 
A little boy was in a relative's wedding. As he was coming down the

 aisle, he would take two steps, stop, and turn to the crowd.  While

facing the crowd, he would put his hands up like claws and roar.  So it

went, step, step, ROAR, step, step, ROAR, all the way down the aisle. 

 As you can imagine, the crowd was near tears from laughing so hard by

the time he reached the pulpit. When asked what he was doing, the child

sniffed and said, "I was being the Ring Bear."
 #####################################################
One Sunday in a Midwest City, a young child was "acting up" during

 the morning worship hour. The parents did their best to maintain some

sense of order in the pew but were losing the battle.  Finally, the father

picked the little fellow up and walked sternly up the aisle.
On his way out, Just before reaching the safety of the foyer, the little

one called loudly to the congregation, "Pray for me! Pray for me!"
 #########################################################
And one particular four-year old prayed, "And forgive us our  trash

baskets as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets."
 #######################################################
A little boy was overheard praying: "Lord, if you can't make me a

better boy, don't worry about it. I'm having a real good time like I am."
 ########################################################
A Sunday school teacher asked her little children, as they were on the

way to church service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in Church?"
One bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."
 ########################################################
The preacher was wired for sound with a lapel mike, and as he preached,

 he moved briskly about the platform, jerking the mike cord as he went. 

 Then he moved to one side, getting wound up in the cord and nearly

tripping before jerking it again. After several circles and jerks, a little

 girl in the third pew leaned toward her mother and whispered, "If he

 gets loose, will he hurt us?"
 ##########################################################
 Six-year old Angie, and her four-year old brother, Joel, were sitting

 together in church. Joel giggled, sang and talked out loud.  Finally,

his big sister had had enough. "You're not supposed to talk out loud

in church." "Why? Who's going to stop me?" Joel asked.
  Angie pointed to the back of the church and said, "See those two men
  standing by the door?  They're hushers."
 ###########################################################
My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you 

know how you and God are alike?"
I mentally polished my halo, while I asked, "No, how are we alike?"
"You're both old," he replied.
 ##########################################################
 A ten-year old, under the tutelage of her grandmother, was becoming

quite knowledgeable about the Bible. Then, one day, she floored her

grandmother by asking, "Which Virgin was the mother of Jesus?  The

virgin Mary or the King James Virgin?"
 ##########################################################
 A Sunday school class was studying the Ten Commandments. They

were ready to discuss the last one. The teacher asked if anyone could

 tell her what it was. Susie raised her hand, stood tall, and quoted,
"Thou shall not take the covers off the neighbor's wife."
##########################################################